Hypnotic Language is one of the most powerful forms of persuasion on the planet. It utilizes the core concepts of hypnosis which are designed to direct the thoughts of another person to your desired direction. Only instead of using the techniques in a therapeutic setting, you're simply using them to be more persuasive. The thing is, there's a very fine line between persuasion and manipulation. In fact, the only difference between the two is the intention of the end user. When dealing with something as powerful and effective as hypnotic language, things can go from persuasive to manipulative very fast so you need to really be cognizant of how you use the techniques.
That being said, there's a formula or "blueprint" as I like to call it when using hypnotic language and in this blog post I'm going to share it with you.
Ready?
OK let's go.
The following techniques can be used out of order, when appropriate. However, hypnotic language when used in everyday conversation typically follows a particular procedure and order, as indicated below. It is recommended that you start by following the ensuing stages of hypnotic persuasion in order, one at a time, gradually advancing from one stage to the next. After you have practiced all these techniques and experienced some success with them, then you may be prepared to mix up the order and method that you use.
Step 1: Assess The Hypnotic Landscape
Before attempting to persuade someone using hypnotic language, you should ensure that hypnosis is necessary or even beneficial for yourself and for them. Begin by asking in a non-confrontational way about the issue or issues that concern you. If you are looking for a raise, ask your boss about the raise schedule, or his or her evaluation of your performance. If you are trying to convince a co-worker to cover a shift for you, ask him or her about their upcoming schedule, or whether they have been getting enough hours of late.
Ask yourself, how far is this person from agreeing with you? Is there a logical or explicit way that you might be able to reason with them or convince them to think or behave in the way that you desire? Is it necessary for you to resort to alternate methods of persuasion to get what you want from them? How badly to you desire the outcome you are seeking? If all your answers to these questions point to the use of hypnosis, move ahead to Step 2.
Step 2: Assess Emotional and Psychological Preparedness
If you have determined that persuasion using hypnotic language is necessary, you now must determine if it is advisable. To determine this, ask yourself if there is any emotional or psychological benefit to hypnosis for the person you are attempting to persuade.
The benefits of hypnosis are many and varied, of course. Hypnosis is widely recognized as an effective means of achieving relaxation and perspective in the face of stress and anxiety. Hypnosis can also help a person divert attention away from distracting or troubling things. These benefits alone may be sufficient to justify the use of hypnotic language.
Before proceeding, ask yourself what you know about the psychological and emotional state of the person you are looking to hypnotize. Is this person currently distressed, or at risk of becoming distressed? Will being hypnotized be a threatening experience for this person? Are they desirous of increased relaxation or mental and emotional distance from their concerns and problems? Furthermore, will they benefit from thinking or doing what you’d like to persuade them to either think or do? If all signs point to positive effects of hypnosis, you may proceed to the next step.
Step 3: Forge The Connection
Using soothing words, passively voiced sentences, and soft vowels and consonants, speak in a manner that will help to calm and relax your conversation partner. Speak in a low and nonthreatening tone. Repeat some of the phrases or words that your conversation partner says, to communicate with him or her that you are both on the same page.
You may wish to supplement this with body language or behavioral mirroring. Take on a posture or sitting position that emulates your conversation partner’s. Reflect his or her facial expressions or tone of voice, but do so in a way that isn’t overly exaggerated or obvious.
Avoid speaking rapidly, or about any unpleasant topics. Ask your conversation partner about enjoyable experiences or topics thatinterest them, but do so in a low energy, slow fashion that will discourage them from getting excited.
Step 4: Initiative Seductive Active Listening
When you speak to your conversation partner, you do not want to dominate the conversation too heavily. This may elicit boredom or leave your conversation partner feeling ignored or alienated, which is a surefire way to put them on the psychological defensive. At the same time, you do not want your conversation partner to be speaking too frequently, too rapidly, or with too much emotion. Excited, lively conversation will pull your conversation partner away from a relaxed state. It will also give them a sense of agency and control, which is not amenable to hypnotic influence.
Instead, listen and guide the conversation. Make soft, but noticeable verbal and physical signs that indicate your attention and interest. Say “hmmm” or “ahh” when your conversation partner speaks about something calming or pleasant. Give your conversation partner the sense that you are drinking in their words. Ask slow, contemplative questions about what they mean or what they feel. As you do so, make heavy, relaxed eye contact. Let your conversation partner stare into your eyes and feel soothed by how receptive you are to their words.
Step 5: Direct the Conversation
As you speak with the person you would like to hypnotize, maintain subtle control of the conversation. If the participant drifts away from the subject desired, pull them back in with a thought-provoking question or interesting fact or note. Do so gently, with a voice that is not forceful or intimidating. Merely reel your conversation partner back into the topic you’d like to persuade them on. If your conversation partner becomes agitated, or becomes focused on a persistent worry or something negative, steer the conversation to something completely different, pleasant, and calming. Never let the conversation veer into negative territory, and do not allow the participant to speak at length about their disagreement with you, or why they cannot do what you’d like from them.
Step 6: Assume a Positive Outcome
People frequently behave in the manner expected of them. If you give your conversation partner lots of small indications that you expect them to do what you desire, they may slip into meeting your expectations without much conflict. Do not ask your conversation partner directly to engage in the desired behavior, or inquire about the specific belief that you are trying to change. Instead, frame the discussion as if they have already agreed with you, and now you are just hammering out specifics.
If your conversation partner responds with discomfort or confusion, lead the conversation away from the issue where you disagree. Ask them about something pleasant that has happened to them, or tell them an anecdote about a subject that you know is soothing to them. Return them to a state of apparent calm, where their breathing is slowed and the conversation is easy. You may choose to disengage from the conversation temporarily if persuasion is proving difficult.
Step 7: Engineer Agreement
Using positive language, pleasant behavior, and encouraging nonverbal actions, slowly shape your conversation partner’s behavior and speech in your desired direction. When they disagree with you or seem anxious, redirect conversational attention, or withdraw from the conversation completely. Conversely, when they are in an agreeable, helpful, or passive state, reward and encourage your conversation partner by speaking slowly and calmly about soothing topics, using soft sounding words and a passive voice.
Over time, you will find that you can subtly manipulate your conversation partner into entering a hypnotic state with increasingease. After habitually directing and shaping your conversations in this way, you will effectively “train” both yourself and your conversation partner, so that every conversation you engage in together leads down a path of mutual understanding, psychological openness, and emotional calmness.
Tips and Tricks
The core techniques and key terms listed above are, strictly speaking, all you should need to induce hypnotic states of focus and calmness in a receptive conversation partner. However, learning the ropes of these techniques may prove tricky at first. It can be unclear where you should begin, or what effective persuasion and hypnotic language “looks like”. Here are some quick tips and tricks for increased success.
Begin with a familiar conversation partner who is relatively easy to persuade on some matters. Getting early positive results is encouraging!
Persuasion and hypnotic inducement is much easier in a familiar setting that you have control over. So test out your techniques by inviting a friend or family member over to your house for dinner, or bring a co-worker into your office or workspace!
Practice meditation or mindfulness exercises so that you can regulate your own emotions and anxiety. Self-hypnosis may help you to attain an external state of calmness, which will help soothe the people around you.
Practice self-hypnosis on a regular basis, so that you can recall what being hyper-focused, alert, and calm feels like.
Approach each persuasion attempt with a sense of gratitude and peace. If you are frustrated with your conversation partner at the outset, or if you are desperate to “win” the interaction, you will not be able to make them feel safe or ease.
Ask your conversation partner about their day, their interests, their family, and their work. Locate the topics that make their eyes “light up” with enthusiasm. This will not only help you better develop the soothing topics to use when speaking with this person, it will immediately make them enjoy speaking to you more as well.
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