The Five Types of Leaders: Which One Are You?

The Five Types of Leaders: Which One Are You?

Leaders are influential. It's just that simple.

The problem is often times people try to be something that they're not. And other people can see right through that BS.

That's why when becoming a leader, it's important that you stay true to who you are.

In this post we'll cover the six different types of pack leaders that exist.

It’s important that you look this over and determine which leadership style resonates most with you because as a leader you always want to appear natural.

If you try to be something that you’re not people will pick up on it and you will lose all credibility and respect...which is the OPPOSITE of being a leader.

Now once you’ve identified your leadership type I’d like to show you how you can become the pack leader that others respect and comply with using The Pack Leader Blueprint.

More About That Here:

Ok let’s get started.


The Impact of Leadership Styles

From large governments ruling millions of people to the smallest of businesses, people around the world are affected by leadership every single day. Leaders throughout the years have proven to be from one extreme to another, with many successes and just as many failures. Sometimes, what works best for one situation may not be what’s best for another. People can view leaders as too involved or not involved enough, depending on their own personal beliefs and their strengths or weaknesses.

The following is a list of six popular leadership styles, what they are, who they impact, and how they can work or fail.

#1: The Authoritarian Pack Leader

Authoritarian leaders make up the rules or laws, any procedures that may take place, and all the goals of a country or business. They are the sole person to make decisions that can impact a few people or an entire country. Although there have been notorious authoritarian leaders such as Hitler, many small businesses start this way. An entrepreneur just getting started may want total control over his vision until the business gets to a point where considerable help is needed and necessary. People following an authoritarian leader can expect to have all of their questions answered, from when to why to how. Leaders who use an authoritarian style can come across as dictators, controlling, or very bossy.

#2: The Paternalistic Pack Leader

Paternalistic comes from the root word paternal, meaning fa- ther or characteristics of a father. A paternalistic leader will come across as the father figure for a company, one in which the employees are almost viewed as children who should fol- low his lead. This type of leadership runs into problems when the father figure has a big ego and can’t relate to his employ- ees. This type of leader can quickly turn dictatorial and may make bad decisions for the company, further alienating his employees. Typically, the only people who enjoy this type of leadership are those who prefer to take on the role of a fol- lower and believe that somehow the paternalistic leader is go- ing to take care of them, much like a father would. Instead of being provided food and shelter like a child, they are provided a job and pay.

#3: The Democratic Pack Leader

A democratic leadership style is popular because people feel involved. A leader doesn’t make decisions on his or her own, instead, they bring in more people to guide their decisions and get input and feedback from them. This creates a sense of people’s voices being heard and not having rules or laws made for them without being able to speak out on it and give their views and opinions. However, this also means that when decisions are made, good or bad, everyone has some respon- sibility in the outcome.

#4: The Laissez-faire Pack Leader

A leader who is laissez-faire is one who is passive or has a laid back attitude towards their leadership. This type of lead- ership can be frustrating for employees who like interaction and need feedback. Laissez-faire leadership works best when the leader is surrounded by management and staff who are competent at their jobs and need little input to get things done. In a government role, laissez-faire can mean few regula- tions and little oversight of the people. Problems arise when things go wrong, because people start to blame one another for any mistakes that were made, but there isn’s always a clear understanding of who is to blame.

#5: The Transactional Pack Leader

Transactional leadership is based on the relation of an em- ployer and employee. An employee is hired to do a specific job and is paid monetarily for doing that job. This is what gives transactional its name, the idea of doing work for money. There are millions of leaders who follow this style, but for the employee who can think outside of the box or has a morecreative mind, this type of leadership can prove to be sup- pressing, leaving them feeling unfulfilled in their work. For employees who enjoy knowing what their defined role is, this type of leadership works well. It is also easy for the leader to supervise or give more explicit direction should it be needed.

#6: The Transformational Pack Leader

Many people would argue that this is the best leadership to have when it comes to a business or company. A transforma- tional leader is one who has a direct, positive impact on the employees. They believe in transforming the company into the best it can be by allowing employees the opportunity to reach their own personal potential. Transformational leaders have the ability to motivate and inspire employees to do their best, ensuring the company reaches its goals. People who work under transformational leaders tend to enjoy their work more and perform at higher levels. The transformational leader typically shows passion in their work, has a high level of energy, and exhibits emotional intelligence.


Now that you’ve figured out which pack leader type...

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Five Ways To Begin Conversational Hypnosis

Training yourself to become an effective conversational hypnotist can sometimes be difficult because there are so many areas to cover and so many techniques to master. Let me be the first one to admit that it is not going to be a walk in the park if you are seeking true personal excellence. But then again, nothing is really easy in this life, right?

The easiest thing to do in our world today is to simply quit and I am fairly certain that this is the last thing on your mind. And this is the reason why I created this check list for you. It will cover a variety of techniques, mixed together to give you a better sense of your responsibilities as a persuader/ influencer/hypnotist.

Bear in mind that no singular list can ever sum up all of the things that you need to cover when you are practicing conversational hypnosis. But this does not mean that you will never get a good handle on the subject. This just means that you have to learn as much as you can and practice as much as you can, too.I

If you are ready to improve your chances of becoming a successful hypnotist, let me help you review some of the most essential techniques in conversational hypnosis and hypnosis in general.

1. Refocusing - The fastest way to bring someone into a hypnotic trance (even if the subject is not aware that he is being hypnotized) is through the process of refocusing.
Refocusing is actually very easy to achieve when you are interacting with another person. All you have to do is to introduce a peculiar stimulus that will temporarily take away your subject’s attention on whatever he was thinking of at the moment.

Hypnotists are known for being extremely creative with the process of refocusing. They use a variety of ruses and tools to achieve hypnotic trances.

One of the more popular tools is the swinging pendulum. The pendulum really has no magical powers, as you may already know. It’s the swinging motion that really helps the hypnotist create the hypnotic trance.

The same effect can be achieved with an imaginary crystal ball or a swinging pen cap.

A shiny golden watch with a chain or a gleaming pendulum might sound neat, but since you can’t use any of those things when you are covertly hypnotizing people, your best recourse would be your own words and the stuff that you find in your immediate environment.

For example, instead of holding a swinging pendulum in front of your subject, you can just ask him to take a look at a strange looking tree in the distance. The distraction will allow the subject to enter a hypnotic trance.

2. Suggestion - The power of suggestion is still a vital component in any kind of hypnosis. The ‘truth’ as it is perceived in objective reality has little to do with the kind of reality perceived by your subject. What is true for ninety other people might not be true or real for your subject if you conditioned him to believe otherwise.

So instead of just trying to persuade your subject to believe, I want you to really exert some effort to create an alternate world for your subject. This alternate world will have slightly modified coordinates so that the truth as you espouse it will gain immediate validity.

3. Agreement Frames - If your main goal in an interaction is to simply gain the approval of your subject so you can produce a definite outcome (e.g. a sale), what you really need to do is to use agreement frames. Agreement frames are used not only for establishing rapport but also for preconditioning the subject to just agree with everything you are saying. Agreement frames can work quite well because you are working directly with the subject’s feedback and you can adjust your statements based on whether the subject is actually responding to what you’re saying.

4. Project Confidence - If reading your subject’s body language in general is important then it also logically follows that you have to be more conscious about your own gestures, body postures and facial expressions. If you want your subject to respect you as an authority, always use gestures and expressions that exude confidence and calmness. Your gestures should always be dynamic and open, not closed and defensive.

5. Guided Visualization - A person can experience several levels of trance; the deeper he goes into the trance the more in-tune he becomes with you and your message. How can you ensure that your subject will slip deeper into a trance without him noticing it?

The trick is in the way you create guided visualizations for your subject. Guided visualization is simply appealing to a person’s creative unconscious.
You see, the human mind depends greatly on visualizations to make sense of the world. Language itself would not mean anything if a person was not able to imagine something.
When I say “fat red cat with yellow bouncing ball”, your mind will immediately attempt to decode my message by taking each element of the expression and giving it a corresponding image or in some cases, sound.

You should take advantage of the fact that people are so dependent on visualizations to make sense of reality. Try to create deeper trance states by encouraging the subject to imagine himself in some other location or event.

Once the subject is in that new location in his mind, you can continue deepening the trance by asking the subject to think about your message again, before shifting to another imaginary place. Hypnotherapists use this technique all the time and the results are nothing short of amazing.

People have been known to quit smoking or alcohol almost overnight under the hands of powerful hypnotherapists who did nothing but give the ‘talking cure’.

You can take the same powerful principles in clinical hypnotherapy and appropriate them for conversational hypnosis. You might not be in a clinical hypnotherapist’s office but you are still a hypnotist capable of using different techniques to achieve the best outcomes.

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Three Ways To Gain Compliance With NLP

I'm a big fan of NLP. And for many reasons...which I won't bore you with here.

Instead, I'll tell you just one: Through extensive research Richard Bandler & John Grinder made sense of some of the most complex questions we have about what makes people achieve greatness at certain things.

And a large part of their findings had to do with language; both the language that we use when speaking to others as well as the dialogue we have with ourselves in our minds.

Today I want to share 3 simple NLP language techniques that you can start using right now to influence, persuade and gain compliance .

#1 Mind Shift

Too often we are faced with the problem of having to deal with a subject whose line of thinking seems to be stuck in one direction. Unless you know how to shift that person’s mind flow, you will have to wait until he finishes with what he has to say. Sometimes, it’s better to interrupt and then shift the issue at hand so you can accomplish your goals faster. It’s not that I’m encouraging you to not listen to your subject.

What I am emphasizing is that you have to learn to stealthily shift the conversation to your target issue or topic so you can lead the subject more easily to where you really want to go. You can do this by using the redefine pattern.

When can you use the redefine pattern? Here are some instances where this NLP pattern would be most useful:

1. When you find yourself in an endless argument with someone who doesn’t seem to want to back down from a single issue.
2. When you encounter an invalid or stalling objection.
3. When the subject seems to be talking about something that is not even remotely related to the target issues.
4. When you want to ask someone out on a date but the other person is talking about something else.

As you can see from the list, the redefine pattern can be used in business and even in the most basic of personal interactions with other people. It can be used in everyday situations. The pattern itself is also very easy to remember:

“The real issue here is not (A), it’s (B) and because of that...”
The (A) variable represents the non-target topic or issue while the (B) variable is the new topic or issue that you want to open up.

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# 2 Agreement Frames

One of the biggest problems in the field of influence is that we can’t influence a subject if the subject doesn’t even want to listen in the first place. We can’t execute any of our brilliant plans if the other party is ignoring or worse, being defensive to the point that he is no longer capable of listening to any logical argument. In such instances, you can use an agreement frame to ensure compliance – and I can assure you, the subject won’t even know why he has complied with you and why he has chosen to consciously listen to what you have to say.

As you can see, this particular NLP pattern will work on creative thinkers and logical thinkers alike. No matter what kind of mindset the subject has, it would work. An agreement frame allows a person to agree with another person but at the same time he would be able to add elements that are completely opposite to what the other person is actually saying. It sounds a little crazy straight from the page but trust me – this is classical neuro linguistic programming at its best. Before I reveal the pattern to you, I have to remind you at this point in time that no pattern will be effective unless your vocal skills are supporting what you want to accomplish.

Your voice has to be just as influential and persuasive as your words. Most influencers get too excited and rush the words as they come to mind. Don’t do this anymore because it reduces the effectiveness of your message.

Transform that energy and excitement into a deep and slow cadence so that the other person would easily absorb and process the information coming from you.
Now that we’ve discussed that, let’s proceed with the pattern. This pattern is just as easy as the previous NLP pattern I discussed with you.

The basic formula is “I agree and would like to add that _____”. Notice that you will be using “and” instead of the more usual “but”.

You will be using “and” because it cues the other person to listen intently at what you have to say. If you use “but”, that would cue the subject to be defensive because you are about to drop something negative. Try this pattern and see how it actually encourages people to listen to views that are different from theirs.

#3 Yes Sets

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if there was a language pattern that you can use that would make people say “yes” even if they haven’t really thought about what they agreed upon? Well, since you are an ethical fellow who probably won’t use such a pattern to cause harm to anyone, I’m going to share it with you in this section. You may have heard of “yes sets” elsewhere; it has been around for decades and it has only been revived recently when the interest in influence persuasion increased. A “yes set” is actually a line of statements that pace and lead people to say “yes!”.

Pacing and leading are basic skills of hypnotherapists and NLP trainers. You will be able to pace and lead someone if basic rapport has already been established. If not, you have to go back to square one because people won’t respond to a yes set if they haven’t an idea why they should trust you in the first place. “Yes sets” can be quite effective because they lead a person to believe that everything that is contained within a statement is true.

Here’s an example:

“As you are reading the words on this page, taking in all the useful information, you are feeling more and more relaxed.”

Did you get the formula just by reading the sample sentence? If not, that’s alright, here’s the explanation: a yes set is a statement that is usually comprised by three elements. Two elements in the statement are true and can be easily verified by the senses (taste, smell, sight, touch, hearing) while the third element can either be true or false.

But since it’s a yes set, the person would agree twice in a row and he would most likely accept the third element as true, too. This NLP pattern works well because it latches on cleanly to the cross-referencing tendency of the subconscious mind.

As you are reading this post, remembering these lessons, you will feel the need to practice these methods at least 10 minutes every day to get the best results.

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Five Simple Steps To Influence Anyone

The information in this post is the result of over 15 years of research and hard testing.

It works.

It’s the same strategy that I used to go from being a dead broke, C level high school graduate - who by all accounts should have wound up working an 80 hour a week job that I hated - to a financially free entrepreneur who does what I want when I want.

It’s the same strategy that I’ve taught to over 20,000 customers and over 60,000 newsletter subscribers.

It’s the same strategy that I used to make my clients rich when I was a professional copywriter.

And it’s unlike anything you’ve ever seen before.

How do I know this?

Because I created this unique 5 step process for persuading others from scratch. It’s not something I borrowed or stole from someone else.

It’s mine.

And today it’s yours.

So let’s get started.

This post isn’t about me. It’s about how you can improve your life by gaining the cooperation of others.

But I do think it’s important that you understand who I am and how I discovered this unique strategy. And don’t worry I’ll make it quick.

I graduated from high school in 1997. I had no idea what I wanted to do in life, but I knew I wanted to make a contribution. I just didn't know what that contribution would turn out to be.

I took a job out of high school in sales, and I was pretty good at it. It was actually my fascination with the sales process that led me to where I am today. It amazed me that you could get people to agree with you (in some cases people who had never spoken to you) simply through your actions and your words.

My first job was as a cold caller on Wall Street. I was given a script—a formula to make a successful cold call—and within that formula were different steps, each with a different objective.

Objective No. 1 was to get the person's attention so they wouldn't hang up the phone.

Objective No. 2 was to create a rapport with the prospect and keep their attention.

Objective No. 3 was to give your presentation in an engaging way so they would buy.

I became fascinated with the art of selling, and that sparked my interest in influence and persuasion—getting other people to do what you want them to do.

Then I moved into copywriting, using the tools I had learned in sales. I helped online entrepreneurs sell millions of dollars worth of products and services by creating the right sales messages.

Suddenly I realized I wanted to take the next step—to coach people on influence and persuasion. I read everything I could get my hands on related to influence, persuasion, sales, psychology, and the human psyche—and I started developing training programs.

But here's the interesting thing. My focus had always been on street psychology—taking everything I had learned and applying it to real life settings here in New York City.

I realized that a lot of what I learned about influence and persuasion—while fascinating and intriguing—lacked practicality. The techniques and strategies were either too difficult to remember or too complicated to learn.

At that point I went back to the drawing board. I put aside everything I had studied. I wanted to go beyond the tangible and figure out just what had made me so successful in sales, in copywriting, and in my personal relationships.

That's how this “maverick influence” of sorts came to be. I created a more effective system for influencing people. And the reason I call it “maverick influence” is because it's a little bit different than other programs that teach persuasion and influence. This blueprint is based on the ability to execute persuasion and influence in your everyday life. It's a street-smart approach to the human psyche.

You see, most of the available information on influence and persuasion is redundant and boring. Most of it is based on the work of fans—not players. A lot of the people that publish information on influence and persuasion are psychologists or neuroscientists or highly-educated people. They certainly contribute much to the field through their research.

But there's very little published about applying influence and persuasion in real life situations. Certain things have been proven in case studies—but how do you take that information from the sterile environment of research into a real life situation? You can't. And if it can’t be executed in a real-life situation then what good is it?

So, I decided to throw myself into shark-infested waters and really put this stuff to the test. And if something didn't work (no matter how groundbreaking, intriguing or fascinating) I eliminated it from my repertoire. I didn't want to waste everyone's time trying to execute something just because it sounded cool. Either it worked or it didn't work. I now have the results to prove it.

Now, The Influence Blueprint is specifically designed to underwhelm you. It's designed to be simple and easy to understand in a way that makes it applicable to everyday life. I want you to be able to apply it.

If I wrote you a note telling you there was a million dollars under your bed, but I wrote it in a language you didn't understand, you would never find that money. There would be a barrier in the communication we had with one another.

I find it ironic that so many people who teach others how to communicate have a disconnect in the way they communicate that very message. I want everyone who's interested in this topic to be able to understand the concepts, strategies and techniques of influence and persuasion in order to be able to apply them better.

That being said, let's start with an introduction to the practice of The Influence Blueprint. My goal today is to give you just enough so you can wrap your brain around the core concepts.

The GRIPS Method

These five elements, called the GRIPS method, are the foundation of The Influence Blueprint:

G — Gather intelligence
R — Reduce resistance
I — Initiate control
P — Position
S — Sustain

I want you to associate influence and persuasion with a game, because in my opinion life is a game. I know that might sound weird to some of you—but listen. I can tell you how the movie ends for all of us. None of us make it out alive. No one is going to live forever. Every single one of us has an expiration date.

My point is not to depress you, but to remind you that you only have one life to live, and at some point that life is going to end. So, because life is a game, you might as well try to win. There are different games one can play. You should try to win as many games in the giant game of life as possible so you can enrich your life physically, financially, spiritually and emotionally.

Some games are played for money. Some games are played for love. Some games are played for control. Start thinking of life in terms of a game.

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Before we get into this I want you to understand something very important.

Most of what you think persuades people is probably wrong.

Unless you’ve been studying salesmanship, persuasion strategies and psychology then chances are you have no idea how persuasion really works so let me give you a quick primer.

So the first thing I'm going to do is de-myth some of the stuff you may be thinking or have heard:

MYTH #1 - People use logic to make decisions most of the time.


Human beings are anything BUT logical.

Rather, we are emotional creatures making decisions based primarily using mental shortcuts based on previous information and then using logic to justify what we do.

The scientific term for these shortcuts is “heuristics." To keep things simple, our brains do not like excessive work. In fact, Professor George Miller of Princeton University concluded from his research that the average person can't process more than 7 bits of
information at one time.

So to reserve our cognitive resources, we need a "filing system" for processing information. This means that the majority of the time, we're actually working on autopilot making decisions unconsciously by cross-referencing the information that comes our way with previous information that we’ve come across in the past.

The scientific terms for this are:

Central Processing Route - Here the person is carefully analyzing the information. This usually only happens in extreme life altering cases.

Peripheral Route - Here the person is working on autopilot like I mentioned before.

Once you understand that since people are using the peripheral route most of the time, if you simply learn how to present information in away that is congruent to the peripheral route you instantly gain an advantage.

There is a caveat though - and this again is what makes my approach different.

A lot of so called “persuasion gurus” will tell you how to leverage the peripheral route to persuade people. And I will to.

But the peripheral route is only part of the equation. There are going to be times when you need to change your approach.

That being said. Let’s into the GRIPS Method.

STEP 1: Gather Intelligence

Every game involves some sort of intelligence gathering. Consider professional fighters, who always watch video footage of their opponents before they fight them. Why do they do that? They want to gather intelligence. They want to learn as much as they possibly can about their opponent so they can strategically fight them. So they can strategically defend themselves. So they can strategically disarm their opponent and win.

The same is true whenever you want to intelligently win. The best thing you can do is gather as much intelligence as possible before you go into a situation so you're prepared to conduct yourself accordingly. The same is true even in personal circumstances. You want to know something about a person before you go on your first date. The game of influencing someone or persuading someone is no different. Step No. 1 is to gather intelligence.

Pre-acquired Intelligence

There are two forms of intelligence that you can gather. The first type is pre-acquired intelligence. Pre-acquired intelligence is the best kind of intelligence you can gather. Pre-acquired intelligence arms you with knowledge about a person before you ever meet them.

How do you acquire this knowledge? Well, this is the age of information and the age of social media. The odds of you finding information about someone are 100,000 times greater than ten or twenty years ago. Start with social networks like Facebook, LinkedIn and Twitter. Google their name. Nearly one-third of the world's population has a Facebook account.

Now, there are specific things you should be looking for. Look at where they work. Look at what their hobbies and interests are. Look at their family life and where they live. These types of things will help you get inside of this person's mind so you know the type of person you're dealing with.

Once you meet this person (armed with preconceived knowledge) you want to do two things. You want to highlight the similarities between you and avoid any differences. Now, if this person can't be found online, try to gather intelligence through a third party. Try to get information from someone else who knows this person.

What's most important is to get in the habit of creating a level of awareness about anyone you're going have an interaction with and to gather some pre-acquired intelligence. Once you begin to train your mind to do that, you will begin to automatically look for information. You'll never find something if you're not looking for it. Start to create that awareness.

Real Time Intelligence

The second type of intelligence, real time intelligence, should be gathered when there is no opportunity to gather pre-acquired intelligence. This is necessary in situations where you have an unplanned meeting with someone.

The first way to do this is to observe the person's appearance. Take a look at their clothing, their hair style, their makeup and their jewelry. If you want to become a master of influence, it's important to keep up with popular trends. This will help you get into the minds of as many people as possible and allow you to cross-reference what's unique about your subject versus what might be an imitation of a popular trend. Also take a good look at the environment. Take a look at the furniture and pictures. Look for sports memorabilia. Start to zone in on who this person really is.

The next thing you want pay attention to is their body language.

There are three main channels of communication: verbal communication, nonverbal communication and vocal communication. Although we usually communicate verbally, the nonverbal language is of the utmost importance. Why? Because nonverbal communication is uncontrollable, while verbal communication can be controlled. I can say one thing to you and be thinking something completely different. Nonverbal communication is uncontrollable because it's very hard for my body to react in a way that is incongruent with what I'm thinking. Begin to pay very close attention to someone's body language.

Real time intelligence is gathered through observation. Observe someone's appearance, verbal communication and body communication.

Ask Implicit Questions

The next thing you can do to gather intelligence is to use implicit questions—ask a question indirectly. I'll give you an example.

I was interested in starting a business once and was having a conversation with a potential competitor. I needed access to information he had.

I couldn't just come out and start asking questions about how he ran his business because he might get defensive and hostile. He might lie to me. He might give me the wrong type of information, and that wouldn't help me. What I really needed to know was how much he was paying in rent per square foot. I couldn't just come out and ask him. That might raise some red flags.

It just so happened that when I walked into his place, it was a little hot. He turned on the air conditioner and the place cooled down very quickly. When I mentioned that to him, he told me that the A/C system cooled down his office within five minutes. I said, "Wow. This is a big space to cool down. How big is it?" He gave me the answer I needed without even knowing that I was really looking for information. I was then able to visit other buildings in the area with a ballpark figure of the amount of rent I wanted to pay.

When I worked in Manhattan, I used to see carts that sold fruit smoothies. One day my buddy and I were curious to know how much money someone made selling smoothies. Rather than ask the vendor directly, I suggested we ask him how many shakes he makes per day. When we walked up to the booth, he was sitting with his head in his hands and looked really tired. I said, "Hey buddy, you look tired. How many shakes did you make today?" He told us about 500 shakes. Once we found out the average cost to make a shake, we knew how much money he was making.

When you want to gather intelligence that's personal, most people will be on guard. The key to getting around that is to ask implicit questions. You often can find out what you need to know without them realizing it.

STEP 2: Reduce Resistance

There are many ways to reduce resistance, but today we're only going to talk about three.

The first way to develop a connection with someone is to highlight similarities. Any similarity with a person you find through intelligence gathering should be highlighted because that will bring them closer to you. You want to avoid differences. The third thing is to spend more time performing actions with this person.

Psychological studies have shown that people who perform an action in each other's company develop a much higher level of rapport than those who don't. When two people perform an action together, their level of rapport is ignited and gets taken to the next level.

There's a dating method I learned once in an Internet marketing course I was taking. When you meet someone you really like, you should try to do as many physical activities with them as possible (like bowling or jogging) to strengthen your connection with them.

When you meet someone for the first time, chances are they subconsciously have their defense mechanisms up. Humans are survivors by nature, and anytime we meet someone we haven't met before we subliminally view them as a threat. Our mind wants to know if that person will be going after our "resources."

When you try to influence or persuade someone to give you something or do something, they subconsciously think that you're depleting them of a resource (whether that resource is time, money, or energy). They instinctively want to protect what they feel is rightfully theirs. That's why Step No. 2 is essential. You have to reduce resistance.

STEP 3: Initiate Control

The next step is to initiate control, and there are countless ways to do this. I suggest you check out my program Instant Triggers where I show ten proven triggers for influencing the minds of others. For now, let's just stick with the four easiest and most popular triggers to use.


When you do something nice for someone, they will feel naturally inclined to do something good for you—to reciprocate the favor. That is the reciprocity trigger.

How does this relate to persuasion and influence? It's the process that helps you initiate control. First, do something good for a person. The size of the favor depends on the type of relationship you have with that person. Be conscious of social norms that are governing the interaction between you and then induce reciprocity


People always want what they can't have, and when something is less available they want it more. For example, diamonds are very popular because there is a belief that they are rare (thus, the expense). I have yet to hear about a diamond shortage. This example shows the power of the scarcity trigger. Setting a deadline for buying a product on sale is also a scarcity trigger. Marketers use the scarcity trigger when running promotions by setting a deadline. Why? Because as something becomes less available, people want more of it.

There are many different ways to use scarcity. You can put a time limit on the availability of something. You can use time as a scarcity. You want to place a limitation on whatever it is that you're offering. That will, in turn, make it appear to be more attractive.

Social Proof

This trigger tells us that when people are unsure of what to do in a certain situation, they often look to see what the majority of other people do. This is even true in cases where people are actually sure what to do. The bigger the number of people who are acting in a particular way—the more acceptable that behavior becomes to you.

In order to induce social proof, show your target how a majority of people have widely accepted either your idea or an idea that governs what you're offering, and then also utilize comparison (and there are many different ways to do that).


The last trigger is the comparison trigger. This tells us that the perception of something always changes the moment it's compared to something else.

Here is a really simple exercise. Go get three buckets of water. Fill one up with hot water, one with cold water and one with warm water. Put your left foot in the bucket with hot water; put your right foot in the bucket with cold water and then take both feet and put them in the bucket with warm water. When you do that, the foot that was in the cold water will now feel hotter, and the foot that was in the hot water will now feel cooler. You're standing in the same bucket of water. What's causing this reaction are neurotransmitters communicating through your nerve endings and sending back the message that you're comparing something and it feels different.

Our minds instinctively operate by comparison. That's how we make sense of the world. We take one piece of information, compare it against another piece of information and then consciously or subconsciously make a decision as to how we perceive something.

People in real estate sales use the comparison trigger by taking a client to a house that is a complete disaster first, and then showing them the house that they really want to sell to the client. Showing someone a home they would want to buy with the memory of an undesirable home still fresh in their mind makes the second home look like an amazing buy.

STEP 4: Position Yourself

The next thing you want to do is position yourself as the only logical choice in a person's mind. The reason this works is because people will allow themselves to be influenced and persuaded by you for one or all of the following reasons:

The first reason is because they need a solution.

The second reason is because they believe you will provide an advantage.

The third reason is entertainment.

Psychological studies have shown that the end goal of everything we do in life (every decision we make and every action we take) is ultimately to avoid pain or gain pleasure. We're either doing something to avoid feeling bad, or we're moving forward to something that we believe will provide us happiness.

People will often come to you and allow themselves to be persuaded by you because they believe you will resolve their pain somehow. You will provide a solution. That solution could be money. It could be resources. It could solve a problem. You need to figure out where you stand in the context of your interaction with this person. You need to step out of the equation, look at it as an outsider and think, "When I persuade this person to do whatever it is that I need them to do, what can I provide them in return? Am I providing a solution? Am I providing an advantage?"

One advantage could be money, and money is a funny thing. People desire money for either reasons of pain or pleasure. People that don't have money want to resolve the pain of being poor. People that already have money want the advantages and the power that comes with having more money. That's just one example, and there are many different advantages you can provide to people. It all depends on the timing and the circumstance governing the situation. The question you should be thinking about is, "Am I providing a solution or an advantage?"

The third way to position yourself is through entertainment. This usually happens during the advanced stages of a relationship. Someone just enjoys being around you. They either find you entertaining or they just feel a connection with you. There's an intangible feeling of enjoyment you give them and an exchange of positive energy. Make no mistake. Those three reasons are the only reasons people will allow themselves to be persuaded by you— so begin to figure out what your position is.

Finally, you need to sustain that position. You do that by keeping your lines of communication with this person open. I don't care if you have to write it down or use Post-it notes or your Iphone. When it comes to anyone you have already persuaded to do something or plan to persuade, make a note to communicate with that person at least one time per month.

You want to share valuable knowledge with the person you're positioning from time to time. Sharing information that they're not interested in is completely useless. Based on all of the predetermined work that you've already done and what you know about this person, you want to share knowledge with them that they will find valuable.

Remember that the number one rule when it comes to persuading and influencing anyone is that it's not about you. You have to create the perception that everything is about them. Don't spend your time talking about things that interest you unless that person is interested in the same things and finds the information valuable.

STEP 5: Sustain Your Position

As I said before, your goal in the positioning stage is to be the only logical choice. In the sustain phase, it's all about remaining the only logical choice. You do that by providing constant value in the form of time, money, resources, information and education. Based on the social interaction and social context of your relationship, figure out how you can provide constant value for this person. When you do that, one of two things will happen. When they decide that it's time to make a decision to be influenced, they're going to come to you. Or if they've already done that, they will continue to be open to allowing you to influence them and persuade them.

Secret Agent:Unpredictability

I'm a very big fan of unpredictability—remaining unpredictable. Being unpredictable in many facets of life will get you the attention and the engagement that you need to influence people. Try to think of ways to be unpredictable. To me, unpredictability is grossly underrated, especially in marketing and sales. The more unpredictable your message is, the more open the subject or the target is to being influenced by you.

For now, take the transcript and read through it and start to absorb everything that we're talking about here.


To recap:

This is the GRIPS method.

Step 1: Gather intelligence
Step 2: Reduce resistance
Step 3: Initiate control
Step 4: Position yourself
Step 5: Sustain your position

Everything else that you're going to learn from me is going to be governed by the GRIPS method. Make sure you study it, make sure you understand it because it serves as the building blocks for everything you’re about to discover.

As I mentioned in the “Initiate Control” section, there are countless ways to gain control.

What I want to share with you are the ten most effective and easiest to implement.

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Objection Hacks: Part 1

Objection Hacks: Part 1

It's no secret that if you're having trouble overcoming objections, you probably did something wrong during the presentation. Because had you done it correctly you would have uncovered all the objections early on and would be prepared to overcome them. But guess what? The world ain’t perfect.

So what I want to share with you are 10 “Objection Hacks” that you can use to increase sales.

Hack #1 - Belief Affirmation

Dealing with objections is very common in the world of influence. Objection is the twin brother of agreement – there really is no way to have one without the other. This doesn’t mean you should resign yourself to losses and defeats; you just have to know how to entice agreement (instead of objection).

The easiest way to handle objections is by avoiding them in the first place. You see, people hold their core beliefs and principles sacred. They have to protect these beliefs because these ideas represent stability in a person’s life. Attempting to change them on the spot will cause the other person to become overly defensive.

To avoid the situation where you have to engage in verbal fencing with a defensive influencee, I suggest that you find as many values and beliefs to reaffirm before making your offer.

Because as you agree with another person’s beliefs, his defenses go down until he no longer feels threatened by your presence or your ideas. A person would slam the door on a stranger who’s offering the fountain of youth – but a person would never say no to a best friend who has cooked up a crazy idea.

I want you to strive to become your subject’s ‘best friend’ during the conversation. I want you to make the subject as comfortable and trusting as possible so you can avoid objections. Of course, there would still be objections but as a person becomes more and more trusting, he would find fewer and fewer reasons to object to what is being laid out on the table.

Avoid debates that directly counter the subject’s long-standing beliefs – even if you win, your subject will never forgive you for debunking his belief. It’s better to harmonize with subject as much as possible – arguments only create friction and distance between you and the subject.

Hack #2 - Outcome Focusing

When a master influencer comes across a truly reluctant subject, he must not feel even an iota of despair because even the most reticent subject can be gradually drawn out from their defensive stance and fully influenced.

If your influence groundwork is falling apart, you need a more robust system of persuasion. In this section I’m going to share with eight simple steps that will counter most objections by focusing on the outcome of the transaction between you and the other party.

Identify the problem that your offer can solve. You have to be very specific here because wary subjects tend to ignore generalizations even more. Be specific about the issue or problem that you can help solve.

After identifying the problem I want you to show the subject what would happen if this problem continues and he does not do anything to resolve it. Showcase the negative outcomes (i.e. extra costs over time) that will result from inaction.

Ask the subject what type of resolution or outcome he wants to see after being confronted with the issue or problem.

Ask the subject what would happen if he chooses to solve the problem.

Ask the subject again if this new route (the resolution) is really what he wants at the moment.

Think of the long-term effects of the solution that you are offering the subject. Will it really help the other person or will it benefit only you in the end? Re-evaluate. If you think your solution won’t help in the long-term you have to make this clear to the other subject so he won’t have any undue expectations.

If the subject gives an answer that doesn’t completely align with what you want to hear, don’t be too quick to judge. Hear him out and try convincing him again.

Never insinuate or state that the other person’s beliefs are wrong. You will only open a can of worms each time that you do that. Harmonize instead of creating more friction.

Hack #3 - Peak Experience

Humans have a funny way of processing and remembering events. If a person enjoyed something, even if it were just ten minutes of relaxation, he would remember that for as long as he lived.

But if he were enjoying something and that enjoyment was interrupted for even a short period of time, he would remember the end-experience (which is negative) and forget all about the previous pleasure or enjoyment that he had experienced prior to the negative end-experience.

This is by no means an obstacle to influence but rather, it is a window of opportunity. If someone says no to your offer, backtrack just a little bit so you can ask questions that would later erode the resistance of the subject.

If your offer was rejected at first, I want you to ask the subject about his last experience with your competitor. A competitor is any person (or business, if you are a business person) that was previously associated with the subject. Slowly draw out their negative experience and what happened after they had that negative experience.
At this point in time, your subject will slowly remember the negatives more than the positives because that is simply how the human mind operates. After drawing out the negative experiences from your competitor, slowly lead the subject to what you have to offer and what you can do so that he will never have such negative experiences every again (if he chooses to stick with your offer).

Just make sure that you can back up your claims with action; otherwise, the subject will most likely leave you again after having a bad experience. You can use this tactic to transform a “no” mindset into a “yes” mindset. It might take some time to take effect, but it will eventually work. And it can be used in any situation, too!

Hack #4 - Harmonize

When an influencer is operating on full power, he usually views the subject as a direct target. The influencer will do everything in his power to disprove the other person’s beliefs about what is being offered at the moment. The result of such all-out attacks is usually utter failure.

Because no matter how hard you insinuate that a person is wrong for holding certain beliefs, that person will simply ignore you – or worse, fight you until the very end. And we know what that means for influencers. Influencers are at a disadvantage because if the subject walks away, the influencer walks away with nothing but tension and disappointment.

So here’s my advice to you when you are faced with the task of persuading someone who is unmoving in his beliefs. Don’t tell the other person that he’s wrong. Don’t tell him that he has been holding ineffective or false beliefs all his life.

Don’t say that you are in the right and he’s utterly wrong. Instead, harmonize with the other person and ask him to imagine himself performing something for you by accepting another belief. The subject must realize himself what he can gain by accepting your offer.

And if his beliefs are getting in the way, you must loosen those deeply embedded beliefs by providing beliefs of your own. Beliefs eventually lead to target behavior. Your goal is to change someone’s belief so that his behavior will also change.

You can’t change a person’s behavior for the long term if his beliefs remain the same. Your subject must experience for himself what would happen if he changed his beliefs.

You become more than an influencer – you will actually be instructing and guiding the person as he transforms his deeply rooted beliefs. That is completely different from just saying that the other person is wrong. Doing that will clearly get you nowhere – fast.

Hack #5 - Avoid Option Attachment

There are three things that you would always want to avoid when you are pitching an idea, product or service: buyer remorse, anticipated regret and the worst of the three, option attachment.

Buyer remorse takes place when the person regrets having purchased something from you. Anticipated regret is the decision to not buy anything because the buyer feels that he will only regret it later on. Option attachment is the deadliest of the three because it can leave a potential buyer paralyzed with indecision for a very long time.

What is option attachment anyway? Option attachment happens when a person is faced with two options that he finds very attractive. To the decision-maker, choosing one would mean losing the other good option and so choosing would actually equate with instant loss.

The option-attached individual would also feel that if he chooses one, the other option would probably look tantalizingly attractive a few days later. Faced with this loopy conundrum, the option-attached subject will think about the two options to no end – but he will not make a decision anytime soon. To the influencer, option-attached individuals represent uncertainty and a potential dead end.

You can remedy this problem in two steps. First, you have to make sure that during the dialog, the subject will not grow fond or attached to any other option that you present (in the effort to explore both sides of the coin). To be safe, showcase an inferior option so that it would not be logical to be found of such an option at all.

The decision-making stage should also be as quick as possible. Lead the subject to say yes; don’t wait for him to say yes because if you allow him to do that he might grow even more attached to options that you presented him.

The second step has something to do with the options involved in your discussion. Don’t start with the better option (which is your offer). Start with the poorer option and then transition as fast as you can to the better option. Don’t let the subject develop a connection with the option that will ultimately be discarded.

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Hack #6 - Behavioral Scripts

Objections arise because the subject is unsure where to go – the ‘default’ response to uncertainty is disagreement. Disagreement is equated with stability and avoidance of change.

Change can either be good or bad – but humans instinctually associate change with negative consequences so that’s another obstacle that you should prepare for.

If you do encounter a staunch objection, you can try behavioral scripts to modify the cause of the negative behavior, which is just the belief of the person regarding a particular issue or object. Here’s an example of a behavioral script:

“You open your email in the morning to find that you have made three hundred sales in just one day. You also receive a report that your store has been restocked and your website is in fine working condition. You don’t have to worry about a thing anymore as you prepare for a fine day with the family. We take care of everything, night and day for you.”
When you give a person a script to work with, you are actually giving the other person instructions as to how he can modify his own behavior. He might not understand the nature of the script, but that’s how it works. The best thing about behavior scripts is that people tend to repeat the script even after the meeting.

This is influence in action. Your words and your intentions stay with the subject even if you are not there with them anymore. However, in order for a behavioral script to be truly effective you must instruct the subject to imagine himself in the ideal situation.

It won’t work if he imagines some John Doe getting all the benefits of your offer. He must experience the benefits in his own imagination so that the effect and impact of the script will linger for days. In your next meeting, try asking for compliance again – you might be surprised with the subject’s answer then.

Hack #7 - Buyer’s Remorse Reversal

Buyer’s remorse can ruin repeat business because it can dissuade people from having dealings with you again. Before that even happens, you have to make sure that the subject has been ‘inoculated’ against buyer remorse even before he leaves your sight.

Imagine you were talking right now with a person who seems to be suffering from buyer remorse. He just bought something from you because your offer looked so tempting at that time.

And now he’s telling you that he won’t be ordering again because of reason A, reason B, etc. What can you do to end this irrational remorse? You can ‘inoculate’ this person by supporting his decision outright and by helping him prepare for the remorse that is sure to come. You can say something like:

“We both know that you invested a lot into this service because you want your home and business establishment to be secure, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. It’s for your own peace of mind. What will you tell people if they ask you about your decision to invest a sizable amount for your peace of mind?”

After dropping that vital question, let the subject think of ways as to how he can fully justify his decision to take your offer. By doing this, the subject won’t feel hopeless and helpless when the pangs of buyer remorse start kicking in.

Even if no one really asks the subject why he invested resources for your offer, the justification that he has crafted in his mind will be enough to halt buyer’s remorse. Because in the end, other people’s words won’t really matter – what does matter is what the subject thinks and feels.

If he is defeated by buyer’s remorse, you can forget about repeat business. But if he is successful in battling buyer’s remorse, your influence stays with that person for good.

Hack #8 - Empathize

Empathy is defined as “the action of understanding/being aware/being sensitive as well as vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts and experiences of another person”. To be empathetic means you are consciously putting yourself in the other person’s shoes in an effort to understand him and to communicate with him more effectively.

This might not sound like a solution to objections at all, but if you look at the nature of objections, you will see why it can be such an effective tool of influence. Let me repeat a point I made in a previous section: people only say “no” because you haven’t shown that you can bring them to your target destination safely.

The “no” will stay until you are able to show that you will not cause harm or grief in any way. Empathy is a fast and easy way to project a genuinely caring persona during a social interaction.

To be empathetic means you must how that you are interested and you are an active listener as well. You are there not to take away someone’s hard earned resources but to add to those resources through whatever you have to offer.

When a person keeps saying no to you that simply means that trust and rapport has not yet been achieved. If you are unsure as to how to express your genuine care for the other party, you can ask them questions that will help them relate what they want to achieve and what kinds of solutions they want to see.

As the other party begins to share his thoughts you must continue asking questions so you will get a fuller picture of what’s going on in the other person’s mind. Statements like “I feel the same way about that issue…” can be used to reinforce the idea that you are there to solve the other party’s problems and not add to it.

Hack #9 Strategic Vagueness

Before I draw any violent reactions, let me be clear – strategically vague words and sentences are used frequently by so many people to gain compliance from people; people just don’t know they’re actually using such words. Here are some examples of strategically vague words:

You need a streamlined and proactive system to iron out the wrinkles in your business.

The technological revolution will save businesses from going bust.

The best vacation ever is the one that combines leisure with pleasure.

The best decisions are the ones that are done in the heat of the moment.

At first glance, the sentences above appear to be really positive messages – but in reality, these are vague sentences. That is actually the strength of vague words and sentences; in the absence of clear meaning, the brain assigns meaning to make sense of the input.

Sometimes, it would be best to just let the other subject make his own conclusions on the issue based on a strategically vague input.

When you are getting a lot of objections and flak from your subject, backtrack a little and reintroduce your offer with strategically vague words. Your subject will probably be surprised at the change and he will start thinking differently about your offer.

If that works, stick with the theme and start building your influence groundwork once again. We must all remember that the process of influencing others is not linear nor does it follow a singular, traceable path.

It’s filled with ups and downs and so many twists that sometimes it’s hard to keep track of what you had to go through just to gain compliance. This is the reason why you should always strive to add to your repertoire of influence strategies because you never know which one would come in handy.

Hack #10 - Physical Involvement

If you are planning to persuade someone who is known for saying “no” to new ideas, this technique just might help him say “yes” faster. This technique doesn’t involve verbal techniques or complex persuasion structures.

The only thing that you have to do is to lead the person to do something physically during the interaction. By allowing a person to perform an action related to the interaction, defenses are brought down immediately and the person is forced to show body language that approves of the interaction.

Here’s a sample scenario: let’s say you were about to be joined in a meeting by a person who was known to disagree with almost anyone he meets. How can you ensure that this person won’t disagree with the points you will be raising later on in the meeting?

You can try asking the subject to arrange the chairs for you or you can ask him to help you carry stuff to the front of the meeting room. Think of something for the other person to do so that he would a claim over the meeting itself.

Doing so will reduce friction and disagreement and will ultimately help you persuade and influence that person. There has to be some degree of involvement especially in situations where you have to sell something (urgently) to another person or to a group of people.

If a person becomes involved, he will feel that he partly owns the event/situation and he will feel responsible for producing a positive outcome (any positive outcome always benefits the influencer, or both parties).

The best thing about this technique is that it can be done covertly/secretly – the other party will never know that you were trying to influence him/her in the first place.

This is a good thing because people have a tendency to think that they are being manipulated. If manipulation becomes an issue, the other party might decide to simply walk away from dealing with you.

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Ninja Persuasion Hacks: How To Figure Out How Your Subject Makes Decisions

Ninja Persuasion Hacks: How To Figure Out How Your Subject Makes Decisions

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Persuasion is all about frequency. You’re operating on one frequency. The subject is on another frequency.

The better you can align frequencies with your subject, the higher the odds of you persuading them.

There are countless ways to do this.

This is just one (very important) way to do it.


By understanding how your subject makes decisions you can frame or position your presentation so that they are more receptive to it.

So let’s get started.

Now realize first and foremost, that pain, pleasure and circumstances ultimately have a huge impact on the decisions that people make in terms of these categories. I'm referring to helping people make big decisions, decisions that they really have to sit down and think about and ponder. So taking emergencies out of the equation or situations where people are almost forced into making a decision, we are going to refer to how people make decisions that will affect them drastically when they have the resources, time and the peace of mind to think them through.


#1 The Thinker

Thinkers love to scrutinize, they love to jot down pros and cons and potential outcomes of every option before they actually make a decision. Thinkers love to take a look at details and understand how and why things work. It is important to realize that your presentation must always be structured in a way that thinkers can constantly analyze your message, because if they don’t understand the mechanics behind what you are saying, you will lose them entirely.

When it comes to the data that you present the thinker, it must be hard, factual and quantitative if possible. Numerical data is especially intriguing to the thinker. Because thinkers not only rely on logic, but they want to rely on logic, they tend to put up walls of defense to guard their true emotions and feelings, passions and desires.


#2 The Skeptic

As the name suggests, the skeptics are naturally suspicious people and very rarely will they take information seriously that is not congruent to their own paradigm of the world. In order for them to truly believe information, it must come from sources that in their mind have credibility. Otherwise, they will not accept what you tell them. In fact, they will challenge it and write it off as nonsense even if it is accurate and correct.

One of the initial ways that skeptics begin to trust people is through similarity. If the skeptic believes that someone is similar to them in some way, he or she will assume that their perspectives on things are the same. The challenge in influencing a skeptic is that they make it very difficult to engage emotionally because they can very easily detach themselves.


#3 The Follower

Followers use other people's decision-making processes as reference points to make their own decisions. They typically will do something because it has been proven to work in the past by someone else. They don't like venturing into uncharted territory or do things that have never been done before. They don't like to explore options that have not been proven to work, and they are certainly not innovative or creative people. Followers are great listeners and are very diplomatic when they interact with other people.

They are open to other people's opinions and perspectives on things and tend to have a high level of emotional intelligence. The challenge with the followers is that they can sometimes be hard to identify, because they can easily be misidentified as thinkers and enthusiasts or skeptics.Followers love bargains. To them getting a great deal is everything. And oftentimes, they will trade the risks involved with something new and unexplored for a decrease in price. Sometimes they will jump on an opportunity simply because the prices so low that they don't want to miss out. They enjoy haggling and oftentimes actually find the process to be a source of entertainment. What's interesting about followers is that they can be spontaneous and take action on the spot, but only if they know that doing so has been proven to work before.


#4 The Leader

Leaders are proactive, independent, meticulous, “strive for perfection” type of people. The main emotion that's actually driving all of their decisions is fear. They often worry and easily become anxious or nervous when they think about the unknown. Anytime change or something new enters their life, they automatically assume that it's going to affect them negatively rather than positively.In terms of big decisions, leaders need to feel as though they are in control of the entire process. In a sense, they are possessed with power. They must first review any type of information so they can make a decision based on their own judgments rather than the input or device of others.

Leaders also avoid risk and responsibility, because of fear of failure. Remember the fear is the driving force behind everything that the leader does.


#5 The Enthusiast

Enthusiasts are always looking for something to get involved with. As the name suggests, they are enthusiastic about new ideas and are quick to embrace them. They seek to know more about how that idea can benefit them as well as others.

They're very interested in innovative ideas and can identify with the revolutionary thinking. They love to imagine possibilities, and are responsible and accountable. They care really only about the bottom line. Enthusiasts are interactive, can make decisions very easily and are not afraid of risk.

Enthusiasts as are never afraid to pull the trigger once the timing is right. In fact, if there's one thing that the enthusiast frowns upon more than anything else, it's procrastination and wasting time. Enthusiasts are also very interactive people. They enjoy talking with others and sharing ideas, brainstorming is also very enjoyable to them, as they like to share ideas with others and see how a concept can come to life. They're also known for jotting down ideas on the whiteboard or a piece of paper and leaving it to someone else to figure out how to assemble them. They can be very talkative and engaging people, but they can easily take over conversation and speak very fast and animated. They can also be very interruptive and have little tolerance for the boring and mundane.

Now that you know the 5 major decision archetypes...


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The Single Biggest Copy-writing Needle Mover

In 2006 I wrote a sales letter that brought in around $500k. Since then, it's probably done millions.

I wrote it from my one bedroom apartment in Brooklyn with little to no experience writing copy.

I did it in my basketball shorts and I drank a six pack before I started writing it.

It was on the topic of astral projection.

For those of you who don’t know that’s when you basically leave your body and float around the universe, experience all kinds of crazy sh*t and then come back.

My job was to sell a course that showed people how to do this.

This was for a big client.

A client - that at the time I probably had no business writing for - but found myself with this opportunity through a mutual colleague.

A client - that anyone into mediation, spirituality and consciousness - would immediately recognize as the biggest online leader in that space at the moment. I won’t name names but the company’s initials are MV.

When I started writing this copy I thought to myself how the f*ck am I supposed to write this letter?

What does a guy from Brooklyn who takes the F train to work everyday in his Banana Republic shirt know about astral projection?

The answer?


That’s when I realized that to write this letter I would have to temperately abandon Paul Mascetta - the guy who went to Bishop Ford High School, watched the Sopranos and ate dinner at 3pm every Sunday.


For that moment I was someone else.

We’ll call him Aaron.

Aaron is 5 feet 7 in inches tall & weighs 157lbs.

He’s in his late 30’s, lives in Seattle, smokes pot, lights candles and doesn’t believe in God.

From the moment I started writing I became Aaron.

I asked myself…

What does Aaron hope to achieve in life?

What frustrates him?

What makes him happy?

What pisses him off?

What does it take to be his friend?

Who does he listen to and trust?

And so on.

I wrote the entire letter by simply placing myself in his shoes.

Sure I touched on the benefits and features off the product but make no mistake..

The single biggest needle mover on that letter was..


A few years later I found myself at a mastermind with the owner of the company that I wrote that letter for.

When his time came to shine he quoted almost every line from Breakthrough Advertising by Eugene Schwartz.

He talked about things like market sophistication and how you can’t create desire but only channel it and how every offer was crafted using these principles.

And I sat there thinking “Sh&t, I didn’t use any of that when I wrote that letter”.

Now listen, I’m not saying that the information in BA is not useful. Since then I’ve read the book a few times and think it contains some really insightful information. reiterate..

The single biggest needle mover on that letter was..


I can will be yours too.

So what are you doing about it?

Are you researching your ideal customer, avatar or whatever you wanna call it?

Are you making it your business to align & connect with them emotionally?

Are you speaking their language?

Are you talking about things relevant to them?

If you’re not, you should start.


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