As humans, we feel the need to act in accordance with our core beliefs and values. In other words, it is very difficult for us to behave or act in a way that is different from what we really believe deep down in our hearts. A researcher at Stanford University formulated something called the cognitive dissonance theory.
In his own words, he stated when our actions conflict with our attitudes or beliefs; we become uncomfortable and motivated to try to change. The method by which the Law of Cognitive Dissonance works is by leveraging the fact that people tend to act in a manner that is congruent to their beliefs and values.
When we act in a way that is different than what our values and beliefs represent, we find ourselves in a state of discomfort. Acting in a way that is not consistent with your core beliefs and values can produce anxiety, negative emotions and all-around feelings of general discomfort.
It creates an immense amount of tension within us, and an overall feeling of being off balanced. Human beings like balance and we will do just about anything to achieve it and relieve ourselves from internal discomfort or uneasiness that is caused when we act differently than what we believe is right. When we experience this internal conflict that I speak of, we don't like it and we will do whatever it takes to experience balance once again. There are many different ways in which we do this.
Rationalization - The first method is that we’re going to cover is rationalization. Rationalization is when someone finds excuses or reasons why the loss of balance or inconsistency is acceptable. We often find ourselves justifying our behavior or decisions to make ourselves feel better.
Denial - Next on the list is denial. Denial is probably the most common and easiest form of reducing the tension. In this case, the person simply denies that the problem even exists. They can do this by ignoring the entire situation or choosing to believe that the source where the information is coming from is not reliable.
Correction - The next method that we use to reduce internal conflict is trying to find evidence to support why the information we received is inaccurate.
Reframing - The next method is called reframing. Here, the person essentially changes their interpretation of the meaning behind the message that was given. This results in them either changing their thought process entirely or reducing the level of value concerning the entire matter as if it’s just not that important to them.
Separation - And last but not least is separation. In this case the person simply separates themselves from events or matters that are causing the internal conflict. They do this by saying things like “one thing has nothing to do with another.”
All of the examples above simply illustrate how we alleviate the internal conflict within by doing whatever it takes to convince ourselves that we made the right decision. This is why in sales, it is extremely important to get the prospect to make a purchase on the same day. Once a person has made a purchase, they are mentally vested in the product or service and will then do whatever it takes to convince themselves that they have made the right decision.
A word about commitments…
Of all the results that we can achieve by using the Law of Cognitive Dissonance, perhaps the greatest is getting people to keep whatever commitments they make. Researchers have found that people who gamble are much more confident about the outcome of the game after they have placed their bet.
In general, most people want to follow through on their commitments. If not because of their own personal values and morals, it’s because of the way they feel they will be perceived by society if they don’t. This is why getting commitments from people is extremely important to the influence process. And the more public the commitment is, the more effective the trigger is. There are three types of commitments that you can get from people.
The first is a written commitment which is basically an exchange of promises that is documented and signed between two or more parties.
The second type is what we call a minor commitment. The purpose of a minor commitment is to eventually lead someone into a major commitment. People tend to buy or comply with people that they have bought from or complied with in the past. Therefore, if you can gain a commitment in any form - even if it is small - it will help you because it will eventually make it easier to gain a larger commitment.
And the third type of commitment -which is extremely powerful – is a public commitment. Any time a person makes a commitment in front of other people, they feel a burning desire to support that commitment no matter what because they do not want to look like hypocrites to the public. As an effective sales manager for many years, I not only had every one of my salespeople put their commitments in writing but I also had them do it in front of everyone during team meetings because I knew this would instill in them a burning desire to keep their commitments and not look like failures.
Here is how you put the Law of Cognitive Dissonance to use. First gain a commitment (public if possible) from the other party. The more public the commitment, the more likely they are to keep it. Second you want to gain - what I call - gradual and continuous confirmations. What I mean by this is that you start out with smaller requests that gradually lead to bigger ones. Gaining these types of confirmations does two things.
First, it opens the door for the possibility of the other party complying because you're starting out small. And secondly, it begins the process of them complying with you. And the more people comply with you, the easier it will be to gain compliance from them in the future. One thing you must keep in mind when you are gaining commitments from other people is that these commitments must be voluntary. The person must choose to commit to whatever it is that you're asking of them. You do not want to use force in any way, shape or form, because if you do, the process will have a poor result.
People ultimately want to do what they feel in their heart. And if you force them into doing what they believe is what you want rather then what they want, the internal conflict trigger will backfire on you. In this case, the person internally feels one way and you have forced them to act in a way that is different than that. Eventually, they will have to return to behaviors that reflect their inner values.
Once you've gained the commitment, the next step is to create the dissonance. You do this by showing the other party how their thoughts, decisions and behaviors to not comply with what you are offering is causing them to not keep their commitment. Once you have done this, the person will feel the sense of internal conflict, uneasiness, anxiousness and discomfort. This is where you offer the solution to resolve the internal conflict that resides within them through your product, service or point of view. So again, the three steps to using the Law of Cognitive Dissonance are:
1.) Gain a commitment
2.) Create the dissonance
3.) Offer a solution to resolve the dissoance